Evolution: Clay Aiken -> "Clay Bacon" -> "Gay Tummy-Achin"

Clay Aiken is back... yet again. After all, lately Clay has undergone enough makeovers to rival his fellow quickchange divas: Madonna and Cher.

For instance, there was the brunette solid Clay who rocked at the season 5 American Idol finale, then he packed on about 30 pounds of body fat (a.k.a "Clay Bacon"), and probably twice that weight in spackled-on makeup, for his role in Broadway's Spamalot.

Yet, the latest re-invention of his image would even leave the San Francisco Gay Pride organizers stunned... Now, keep in mind that I expected Clay to look... um, well... "different"... but he is one step away from a L'oreal commercial with his new hairdue. (Maybe) because he's worth it!

Sure he has a wall full of multi-platinum albums, but what do we really know about Clay Aiken?

Now comes "On My Way Here," Aiken's first album on which he had the chance to use writers who could capture his life during the five dense years since he achieved stardom. Given that mandate, you'd expect the songs to plum below the surface of Aiken and express his soul... And they did - at least if below Aiken's surface of powder lies more surface...

From the new songs' lyrics, we discover that Aiken has "seen the best and the worst" of life. He has walked "through fire," "risen from the ashes" and felt "the weight of the world" on his shoulders. Along the way, he also discovered that "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger," which finally led him to realize, "by the grace of God go I."

If the universe holds any more survivor cliches, I've never heard them.

The music Aiken's writers matched to such hoary bromides continues the singer's established love for the kind of power ballads that died in the mid-'80s. More than ever, he sounds like Boy George, only not so butch.

Some of his fans (the "Clay-mates") might call him the male version of Celine Dion, but this album doesn't live up to the standards of a hip and innovative work... it rather leans toward a record that will only be played in elevators and at Safeway supermarkets.

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