Merry Freaken Christmas…

I would very much like to thank the wonderful women in the green Mercedes SUV who stole my parking space this past Friday at the mall. An older gentleman in a baby-blue boat decided to back out of his slanted parking space the wrong way forcing me to back up. I dutifully did the reverse thing and he navigated his ship out and into the stream of traffic. At this point the wicked witch of the West pulls into the empty spot from the other side of the street right in front of me and my mini-van blinker blazing away and the security guard.

Before I even say a word my children are telling me to calm down because they know Vesuvius is approaching eruption quickly. I honk and open my window yelling and she just calmly sits there waiting for me to go away. The rent-a-cop comes within earshot and I tell him what happened and he says it’s been happening all day just ignore it. Ignore it? What happened to Peace on earth and good will towards man?

I decided it was best for all concerned that I not exit my vehicle and just push on. I proceed around the circle and now approached my spot from the opposite direction. The bride of Frankenstein had disembarked from her non-American four-wheeled broom. I took one last vocal opportunity and barked out to her that she has a wonderful holiday attitude and to have a nice day.

The unfortunate thing is even now, three days later, I’m still angry enough to write about it and I have no doubt that scroogezilla forgot the incident the minute she entered the mall. All it did was raise my blood pressure and worry the kids. Aren’t the holidays stressful enough without having to deal with people who shouldn’t be allowed out in polite society?

I must admit though, for braving black Friday with three children in tow that was the only event to blot our very fine day. We patronized half a dozen stand-alone stores and the mall. We had a nice lunch and walked away with several killer deals. All in all it was a great family day and a wonderful start to the holiday season. Despite the Grinch and her wicked ways…

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